My Godmother

As most of my friends know, my Aunt Karin, who is also my Godmother, lost her battle with cancer last Friday and went to meet her Heavenly Father for eternal rest.

It has been such a bittersweet week all the way around. Last Thursday, January 27, I awoke to a dumping of snow so terrific that I immediately went to the computer to check on the status of school closings. Sure enough, no school for NYC! That was great, except that my friends were flying into town that evening to visit and spend a "girls weekend" in the city. I was afraid their flight would be delayed or cancelled.

We enjoyed the snow day and played outside and shoveled a ton! I even enjoyed a long lunch with my friend.

Later in the evening, I spoke on the phone with my Mom as she sat at my aunt's bedside with all of the other family members in Michigan. She held the phone up to my aunt's ear so I could say a few last words to her. She passed away that night....Peacefully, in her home, with my Dad and sister there with her. It really sucked that I was not there with them for those moments. But, I really felt peace about the fact that neither God nor my aunt would want me to spend a lot of time in regret and anxiety about something I could not change. So, I went ahead with my girl's weekend and had an absolutely marvelous time, knowing all along that I was honoring my aunt by living life to the full and finding joy in the blessings God has given me.

Meanwhile, while I'm out whooping it up with my friends all weekend, my husband (and I am not even going to start gushing about him, because there is NO WAY I could contain it in this post, or even in mere words. Let me just say that he is the BEST. THE BEST) planned my flight to MI. He used his airline rewards to get me a cheap ticket, and set everything up for me. After meeting my family at church Sunday and spending a couple of hours with them afterwards, I headed to the airport.

So bittersweet. I haven't carved out time like this for my immediate family in WAY too long. We visited, reminisced, cried, laughed, and shared together a lot.

We dug through boxes of old photos and memorabilia that dated as far back as the 1930's. We pieced together family stories and lineages. I had a great time reading my Grandpa's diary of his return visit to Sweden in 1957. He left there in 1922 when he was 17 years old. He returned for the first (and only) time in 1957 to visit his dying mother and to visit the grave of his sister and dad. I never met my grandpa, as he died at the age of 59, long before I was even born.

But, it was SO COOL to reflect on the lives of my recent ancestors. They had to endure some incredible hardships. Yet, they stuck it out. Who knows what marital struggles they had in the midst of such difficult lives. Yet, they were so tough. And, there I sat with my parents who are married 42 years and felt literally overwhelmed with blessings to have come from my family.

It was so special to celebrate the life of my aunt. She never married, never had children of her own. Instead, she chose a life of servitude to others. She was undivided in her passion for Jesus. He was her first love, and everyone knew it.

At her memorial Monday night, some of us got up and shared. I shared that, although she was my Godmother, she actually was a godmother to every niece and nephew, and everyone she met! She never talked to anyone without encouraging them to pray and reminding them that God loved them. Person after person stepped up to the microphone and shared, and each person felt that they were uniquely loved and special to "aunt karin". After a while, it became so clear that there was a common thread in what each person shared. She treated every one of us as the most special person. She told us each how special we were and never hesitated to encourage our walk with God. Wow. Not only that, but she truly put others first. Always. She was a servant.

It was a humbling time. I think we all realized that we took her for granted. But, we talked about how inspired we are to search out ways to be the "aunt karin" to others who may not be fortunate enough to have that influence in their lives.

I have to end with this. If you have heard it many times, that's fine...you can skim it. I know this is a long post. But, we sang this as a hymn at the conclusion of her funeral mass, and I had tears of joy as I remembered singing this song with her as a kid all the time. She even had it printed on her memory cards. And, she really lived it out.....It's the Prayer of St. Francis:

Lord, make me an instrument of your peace.

Where there is hatred, let me sow love.

Where there is injury, pardon.

Where there is doubt, faith.

Where there is despair, hope.

Where there is darkness, light.

Where there is sadness, joy.

O Divine Master,

grant that I may not so much seek to be consoled, as to console;

to be understood, as to understand;

to be loved, as to love.

For it is in giving that we receive.

It is in pardoning that we are pardoned,

and it is in dying that we are born to Eternal Life.

Amen