good or best?

Today I read this: "The greatest enemy of the life of faith in God is not sin, but good choices which are not quite good enough. The good is always the enemy of the best."

When I read that, part of me wants to feel annoyed....bristled....skeptical. But that is because I rely on MYSELF. How and I supposed to figure out what is good and what is best? Too much pressure.

Then I breathe, and I relax, and I remember that I have made a decision to stop trying to figure it all out on my own. Ahhhh, what a relief. I can ask my creator what He thinks. Seems logical to me.

However, the key is to not wait until I'm in a pickle before I go to God and spend time with him. Because I spend time with him every day, I feel fairly confident that I know him. His character, his promptings, his "voice".

He has challenged me to be patient. It's sorta funny. Patience. That's the thing I have prayed for most fervently. It's the thing that has brought me to my knees in repentance and defeat. It has had such a stronghold on me. Now, here I am, realizing that He has gently led me to a life where I need to practice my new found discipline of patience every day. Yet, He has orchestrated things in a way I could have never planned out on my own.

If I just relied on myself and my own "good" ideas, I am positive that I would miss the "best". I would hit the ground running, get a job (or two), volunteer for everything that I could, serve others any way I saw possible, and still not pass up any offer to let loose and have fun with others. That's all GOOD!

But, through my daily discipline of patience and listening to the promptings of my creator, I have found myself in a much different scenario. A calendar that isn't filled up. Days that are not maxed out. Time that is free and available.

Here's what is interesting. Those vacant squares on my calendar just scream out to me "fill me! fill me! You aren't worth anything if you aren't busy! What are you contributing to society if you aren't working? What are you teaching your girls if you are not modeling what it is like to go to work each day? You could volunteer more! Do! Do! Do! "And, on and on the screaming continues.

Yet.....I resist those "good" things. Because I have heard my Father's voice. He has asked me to do it differently, and I am choosing to obey. He has asked me to STOP and to be available to others. And, let me tell you, that takes patience.

I believe it is the holy spirit guiding me. Why? Because, I have seen the fruit of the spirit in my life. I have seen my character change. I have seen my struggle with impatience healing. I have laughed out loud with joy when God delivers me a "divine appointment" on a day when I am wide open to receive it. I have found joy beyond measure in getting to know other people at a deeper level by investing time with them. I have been an example to my girls, not an example of being a worker in the worldly sense, but a worker for God's kingdom here on earth. They know that when I am with them, I have reserved my energy in order to engage with them and serve them. I haven't spent it elsewhere.

I am not for one single second preaching about what a Mom should do with her time! That's not my point at all. God bless the working Moms! I am simply saying that I feel like I have been able to overcome MY pursuits of what I think is GOOD in order to submit my entire self to what is BEST. Submission to my Lord is what is Best. And, I will do my best to be PATIENT and AVAILABLE every day for Him.