Our energy in this world

More rambling thoughts as I sit in quiet and ask God for revelation and truth.  Journal entry from Feb 12, 2019.

Reading last night one thing jumped out at me about the fact that we have energy we put out into the world - and it can be positive or negative energy.
And it's weird because just yesterday I felt like I reminded myself several times to shift and choose to bring an energy of peace and love into my body and to emanate it out.
I think about those videos I've seen where people's words and anger affect their physical environment.  Like, food rots and turns brown or rice gets black and moldy.  But, it's more than simply angry words.  It's changing the energy that surrounds me by emitting love.
We were created to love and to be loved.
And when negative energy, fear, anger, condemnation, hate, etc creeps in, we find ourselves separated from what we were created for.
Love.
And with love comes peace, kindness, patience, gentleness, joy, contentment, courage, and compassion.
We need to meditate and choose positive energy.  Choose to be filled with love and good. Choose to acknowledge the power of love.  Not just for others' - but for ourselves.
We flourish when we love and are loved.
So, the fact that God is love and can't do or be anything bu love - of course I want more and more and more of the Spirit of God in my life.
It's fullness, freedom and purpose for me.
It makes me experience wholeness, acceptance, unconditional acceptance for who I really am, and it changes me.
I don't want to be angry, judgmental, jealous, unforgiving, afraid, selfish and insecure.
When I continually fill up and choose to accept the unconditional love and positive energy of God - that negative stuff loses it's power and gets pushed out.
I get transformed.  But it's a constant choice.
The negative creeps in, I recognize it, I "take it captive" and identify it as destructive.  I invite more love, truth, positive, good - and I trust that it's real and powerful.  And the negative can not co-exist with the good and positive.
It loses!
Victory!
But then it just keeps happening.
So it becomes a practice.  Anything I want to become good at, I need to practice.  The more I practice, the more natural it becomes.
So, every day I begin by surrendering all of my negative or selfish energy and accepting the pure, good, positive energy of my creator.  I empty myself.  And I fill up on love.  Then I fill up more.  Until I feel I'm overflowing.
Then I ask for wisdom, guidance, perspective and understanding.  I want eyes to see like love sees.  I want a heart drawn to love.
Then so many times throughout my day I catch myself slipping, either slowly or abruptly into those negative, selfish, unloving thoughts. When I don't catch myself, I end up distracted or anxious or annoyed or critical of myself and others or fearful about the future or ashamed that I'm not enough, etc.
And, it's not that I want to cover up those thoughts and feelings.  Maybe those thoughts are somewhat legit and are trying to tell me something.  But, if I catch myself in the negative, I get to stop and choose love.  I get to pull myself out of the negative and ask for perspective that is not condemning.
Because condemnation gets me nowhere.
It just feed on itself and creates more negative.  It doesn't bring anything positive.
It's a dead end.
But, man this negative energy is a liar!
It can lure me in deep.
It tells me that my anger has power and that my judgement of others lifts me up out of my own shame.
It tells me that I need to worry and fret or things won't get done.
It tells me that if I believe I'm good, and that I'm enough, and that I don't need to earn my worthiness - then I'll just be lazy and apathetic.
It lies, and lies, and lies.
But, I know the truth!
And I know that love and truth always wins!
The lies are evil and destructive.  And Jesus destroyed evil.  He destroyed sin.  He offered me power over evil and sin.  He offers himself to me.  To demonstrate that power, he even overcame violence and death.
He shook off death and came back smiling.  He showed that his power is not subject to negative, evil, sinful forces.
And I get to receive that power of love and good and truth!
I get to invite that spirit in and allow it to grow and dominate and push out the negative.
Yes please!
I'll take more of that.
Thank you.