It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas....

We decorated our tree last night and hung our stockings with care. Now Liv wants to bake sugar cookies. That was a new tradition we started last year.

We caught a little Christmas fever when we were in MI for Thanksgiving. We celebrated Christmas and exchanged gifts with the Kelly family. Then we joined the Carlson's for an awesome day of feasting, thanking God for blessings, and just hanging out.

It really was a fantastic weekend. I went shopping, Timm went to high school football playoffs (go dragons) with the guys, euchre party at the panks, and even managed to squeeze in some playtime with the Prouty girls.

I won't mention that we ended up with a flat tire on the way home. OK, since I mentioned it....flat tires really aren't that catastrophic. And, we did end up having tons to be thankful for in the end. However, how frustrating to find a place to pull over and change a tire, pull all the junk out of the back of the van, pull the jack out of it's holding place, realizing it's never been used and still has the plastic wrap on it from 2001....then... For the next 60 minutes, the realization occurs to us that the spare tire has never been accessed, and therefore is immovably rusted to the frame of the van. Nice. Timm was so determined to get that stinkin thing off! To no avail. What to be thankful for? We found a mechanic right there who was open on Sunday evening. They weren't able to get the spare tire off, but they were kind enough to take the flat off, determine it to be irrepairable, and sell us a new one for just $145. With the amount of money we have invested in owning that automobile this year.....we should be being chauferred around in a personal limousine with a full time driver.

Anywho....the Christmas season IS HERE. NYC is such a cool place for the holidays. Tomorrow the girls and I go to the nutcracker ballet. The really neat part is that Liv's friend from school has a part in the ballet!!! Last night we watched a TLC special about extreme Christmas lights. One of the neighborhoods highlighted was Dyker Heights, right here in Brooklyn! So, we are going to make sure we add that to our "must do" list this season. But, each daily square on our calendar seems to be getting more and more packed with activities, events, parties, etc. So, today we decided to clear our schedule and do NOTHING. We are taking the day as it comes and relaxing. We needed it. Maybe we will go out later for a walk down 5th ave and a peek at the Rockefeller center tree? Maybe not. For now, we are still in our jammies at 11am.

Was reminded of something today in my quiet time. There are always forces working against my health. My physical, mental and spiritual health. And I need to WORK in all of those areas to maintain a healthy balance. It takes effort to combat the forces that push against me. It's not something that is achieved PASSIVELY. That's why it is true to say that if I am not actively growing closer towards God, I'm not remaining stagnant, I'm growing further away from him.

The holiday season is a perfect time for distraction. If I am distracted by all of the great things to DO to celebrate our savior's birth, yet I do not take time to worship Him, meditate on His truth, listen to His voice, then the forces that are pulling me away from God are having their way. I must be active in my pursuit of growing closer to my God. And, sometimes that means saying NO to some things that appear good and fun and right so that I can be sure I am working on my relationship with my creator.

That is my constant challenge!

It's Christmas time......in the city.......silver bells.......silver bells.....

Give Thanks

I really do love Thanksgiving. I try to always keep a spirit of gratitude in my heart. Every night when I tuck the girls in, we reflect on what we are thankful for. No matter how crappy the day may seem, we can always come up with a list of things to praise God for.

Although I am so looking forward to some family time in MI for Thanksgiving, it is a little bit stressful because the weekend doesn't allow much time between driving. And, I am sorry to be missing some opportunities to serve in this city for THanksgiving. If we were here, we'd be joining our church family to serve at the rescue mission.

But, since we cannot do it that day, we went down there this past Saturday and helped package up some gifts that will be given out Thanksgiving weekend. It was a lot of fun. Especially because my girls had three friends sleep over the night before, and they all got up pretty early in the morning and headed out to the city to roll up their sleeves and help out. And, they had so much fun. The joy on their faces as they served just warms my heart. Their friends asked if we could do it again some time? SURE!

I hope I can always remember to GIVE thanks....and to just GIVE.......

Life is so much better when I take the focus OFF of myself and instead focus on others.

Happy Thanksgiving.

Oktoberfest or Novemberfest?

Char and Victoria toasting to Vic's first drink in about 3 years! Cheers.
Neal and Megan
Val and Kim

Amy and Nathan (and Alli)

Timm presenting to Harry, Kristy, Maria and Maggie

So, we had our beer tasting party last night. Timm and I can't agree on whether it was an Oktoberfest party that was postponed, or a Novemberfest party. I know, such deep rooted issues of contention we have with each other, right? I love that man. Not only did he clean up and rearrange the whole apartment yesterday in order to squeeze 25 people into our little living space, but today, while I sit here on my bed relaxing and playing on the computer, he is cleaning up and re-rearrangning all of our furniture for a new look. To top it off, he served beer to everyone all night, with nothing but questions and comments from me!

So, here are a few photos. Wish I was better at picture taking. Contrary to what it may appear, my friends are not all celestial beings. I just don't know how to use the flash correctly, so people often appear to be glowing.

Good beer.

Good friends.

Good times.

Fill er up

Last weekend we had a wonderful women's retreat in the rolling hills of up state New York. It was so AWESOME to get away.We achieved our goals of rest, relationship building, and revival!

We focused a lot on really digging deeply and honestly to reveal what we are filling up on. In other words, do I go to Jesus and say "fill er up" and trust that He WILL? Or do I turn to other things for fulfillment? We broke into groups of three to share, pray, and encourage each other.

When I returned home, the Halloween festivities were in full swing. Three of

us arrived to my front stoop to find our three husbands handing out candy and acting ridiculous with the girls and the neighborhood kids. I must say,

Timm did a great job curling the girls' hair, applying their make-up, and even fastening on Liv's false eyelashes!! Yay Timm! And although he didn't feel compelled to dress up himself, Craig and Neal made up for it. At one point, Alice Cooper (Craig) was tossing knives with my neighbor, the ninja.

Oh, can't forget to attach a photo of the girls as they headed to school the Friday before Halloween

. Liv's school does "character day" and she is dressed as "Matilda" from one of her favorite books. Alli is dressed for Halloween. Can you guess who she is dressed up as?

Somehow, a whole week, and another weekend slipped by already. Life moves so fast. God keeps reminding me to SLOW DOWN and to fill up on Him. I am trying.

This past weekend was pretty sweet. On Sunday, Timm played a song on his guitar at church. I SO enjoyed worshiping while he strummed the chords....very special for me. Then, I was able to meet up with my great friend to cheer her on in the the marathon. What a sight to see! MILLIONS of people. Huge event in NYC. And, I even got to run with her for a while. That was neat. Now everyone keeps asking me when I am running one....I don't think so. But, I have decided I'll do a half marathon. I feel that's a good goal for me before I turn 40.

Words at a funeral

I was so honored to be able to share a few words at Sharon's funeral. I had written it down because I knew if I didn't, I'd risk talking all day long! One day, while I was sitting in Sharon's room, knowing that our time together was coming to an end, I thought about what I might say if I was able to speak at her funeral. I prayed for God to inspire me. Here is what a was able to share:

A mother really has an incredible power to set the tone of the home. Somehow she is the heart and soul of a home, of a family. I feel so blessed to have seen and felt that power in this family. In this home. Sharon has been the very heart and soul. She has set the tone. A home full of grace. peace. acceptance. love. nurturing. honesty. joy. laughter. generosity. celebration.
She has always seemed to do it so effortlessly. I think it's because she was right in step with God's will for her life. She was living it out every day, in every little way, in every moment. She was modeling for others how to live as a servant. Here to serve, not to be served. And I just hope she knows the incredible legacy she's leaving.
For her kids, for their friends throughout the years, for the grand kids, for all of the nieces and nephews, for her daughter-in-laws, for her siblings, and truly, for an exponential number of people who will be better people for having known her, her family, and those she has touched with her servant's heart.
She lived out God's plan. He created us to honor and glorify him. And he wants us to do that by giving up our own selfish, sinful nature in order to serve others. Anyone who knew Sharon knows that is exactly how she lived. And she just did it with such grace. So effortlessly. She was being the hands and feet of Jesus to everyone, all the time.
Isn't it cool to reflect now and to picture her humble smile, knowing that was Jesus? Or reflecting on a time she gave up her time to serve you. Or gave you a gift. That was from Jesus. He loves us so much, and Sharon was able to show us some of His love by serving us.
What an inspiration Sharon has been to me. Some of the things I learned from her:
*how to laugh at myself
*how to be in the moment....and how to enjoy the moment
*how to be generous
*how to love....whether I think a person "deserves" it or not
*how to love my kids enough to give them WINGS and encourage them to fly, even if it means they might fly away from me
*not to worry about the little things
*and together, we learned, not to worry about BIG things.

A few days after I learned of her diagnosis, I found myself laying awake in my bed worrying. About the next day, the next week, month.....year. I was getting myself so worked up that my heart was racing and I had a pit in my stomach and I felt so out of control.
Then, God put a scripture in my mind. and, you can ask Timm, who was laying there beside me, I was instantly overcome with peace and relief.
It was Matthew 6:34 "Therefore, do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of it's own."
I took a deep breath and remembered that God promises us strength and grace sufficient for today. He doesn't say "Oh, and when you start to worry about tomorrow, next week, net year, and every possible scenario that could unfold, I'll give you all the grace right now that you will need for that too." Nope, But, he does PROMISE enough strength for today.
I shared this with Sharon. And, a few morning later, she called and told me she "tried my technique" last night and it worked!!! She couldn't get to sleep, found herself fretting about the future, but then she remembered what that verse said and the next thing she knew, it was morning and she had slept soundly for hours.
I laughed and told her it wasn't MY technique, but truth from God, our creator and Father. And it works because His plans are always perfect.
So, together, I believe we learned to lean on that truth. If we have today, let's not worry about tomorrow just yet.
As I say by her bedside all last week, there was an awesome quote printed and propped up on the headboard. I'd like to share it with you.

Do not look forward in fear to the changed of life;
rather, look to them with full hope that as they arise, God whose very own
you are, will lead you safely through all things.
And when you cannot stand it, God will carry you in His arms.
Do not fear what will happen tomorrow,
the same everlasting Father who cares for you today
will care for you today and every day
He will either shield you from suffering or will give you
unfailing strength to bear it.
Be at peace and put aside all anxious thoughts and imaginations.
St. Frances De Sales

Looking back, I knew I had an amazing mother-in-law from day one. I was always thankful and I told my friends that I was sorry that they had "mother in law stories" but I just could not relate. And then I had kids...COME ON! That's when I almost couldn't tell my stories anymore with my friends. It just felt like I was exaggerating or rubbing it in. Because I literally had the best mother in law in the world. My friends will tell you, I am not just saying that now because she is gone. I have said that for years.
I am a better person for having had Sharon in my life. Her legacy will live on through generations. Her gentle, loving, generous, gracious spirit lives on through all of us. Like I said, it is the very spirit of Jesus that she showed us and lived out.
She made the world a better place.

Olivia's poem

I wanted to share a few words form Olivia. When we were saying goodbye to Grandma, Olivia left the room and when she came back in, she had a pen and paper. She sat at the foot of Grandma's bed, and she wrote:

Grandparents love you

With 42 years of marriage
I'd like to see you in a carriage
riding down an isle of roses
making laughter and striking poses

You are the granparents I always wanted
sometimes we even flaunted
when we look at the sky, it is so bright
that's because it's heaven's lights!
that's where you'll be grandmother dear.
but do be aware, there is nothing to fear
You'll have Jesus Christ all day
just remember that it's OK
someday we will be up there
with the friends that you made
all the friends that greet you everyday
just remember that every granparent out there
love their grandchild in a different way
but I especially love the way you do it grandma.

the storm, the rock

I'm back in Michigan.
Craziest stretch of time. On Tuesday, the girls and I said goodbye to Grandma. We hugged her, kissed her, and told her we were done bugging her! We assured her that she didn't have to try to give us a hug with her arms, or a kiss with her lips. Because we know that we have an endless supply of her love for the rest of our lives here on earth.
Timm stayed in MI to be with her and to help his Dad care for her.
Tuesday night, we got home from the airport at about 8:30. Just enough time to try to get our stuff in the apartment and get the girls tucked into bed since they were anticipating going to school the next day. The only problem was that Olivia was complaining of a LOT of pain in her ear ever since we landed. Olivia is a tough cookie. If she says something hurts...it HURTS.
We didn't end up sleeping much. Between taking Olivia to the emergency room for her ear and getting a call that Grandma had passed away peacefully in the night, we gave up on the notion of sleeping. Instead, we unpacked, repacked, and drove all the way back to MI.
So, here we are.
Most of us have heard about the bible verse that talks about building your house on "the rock". There's a great little sunday school song about it.
But, reading those verses in Matthew today, I felt the meaning so powerfully.
Matthew 7:24-25
24Everyone then who hears these words of mine and does them will be like a wise man who built his house on the rock
25 and the rain fell, and the floods came, and the winds blew and and beat on that house, but it did not fall, because it had been founded on the rock.
I think a raging storm is a really good picture of what hit this family this week.....this year. And, it's truly amazing. I have had the privilege of sitting in the eye of the storm, and witnessing the peace that transcends all understanding. THe peace and comfort that comes from the rock on which THIS family was built.
When the winds shipped in, we gathered together. We literally sang praises to our creator. We laughed and cried and held hands and experienced joy and peace so deep, no force on this earth could penetrate it or SHAKE it!
THAT is the ROCK this scripture refers to. Jesus Christ.
For those who do not know that kind of peace, I pray. And I pray that this family not only rests in the absolute power of that rock solid faith, but that this family can shine light into darkness. That each person in this family can help someone else find that rock to build their life on.
I can't say enough about the love I have experienced this week. I have always experienced it in this family. And I am blessed to experience it in my family too. But there is something about a storm like this. When we all had to reach beyond our own ability to cope and lean on that great Comforter. And we will continue to lean on Him. It's humbling.
This experience has solidified my faith in ways so deep.
I'm not for one second minimizing the tragedy of Sharon's suffering or our loss.
It sucks so hard, it's like sucking on a straw after getting your wisdom teeth extracted, then getting a dry socket that gets infected and the pain of the infection is so intense, you'd prefer someone to chop your whole head off than to endure one more second. IT SUCKS.
But, I haven't even had to TRY to find God in this, or beauty in this.
God is so present, I"ve experienced Him with my senses. And the beauty is so complete, my words can't convey the image because it transcends my words. It's that real.
This is long, I know.
Someone could tell me about God all day long, I could read about him for years, but I can say, I have met God. I've hung out with him. I've experienced Him with all that I am.
THANK YOU SHARON for that gift to me and to so many others.
Dance, sing, celebrate for eternity. Enjoy your rewards in heaven. Can't wait to see you there.