About Me

I'm not really a superstar, except maybe to my husband, who I happen to be deeply in love with. My life: following Jesus, learning to live and love like Him. He is in the driver's seat, and I am on an adventure.

Monday, October 18, 2010

I'm a KELLY

When I got married, 14 years ago, I gave up a maiden name that I had a lot of pride in. And I took my husband's name. Kelly. I was humbly honored to take that name. But, never before have I felt so proud to be a Kelly.
This week I am witnessing love.
We use that word so flippantly. I love ice cream. I love your hair. No....not that kind of love. But, LOVE.
I have a passion for the covenant of marriage. A burning desire for people to take their commitment seriously and to treat it as a covenant created by God to reflect the kind of love He is to the rest of the world.
Here I sit...4 days after getting the phone call that Timm's mom is at the end of her short battle with cancer. Hospice is stepping in to assist in the process of dying with dignity. By the time we were able to fly to Michigan and be at her bedside, we had just a little bit of time to get our selfish fill of love FROM her. In the form of eye contact and head nods and small smiles, we were fed one last dose of love from a woman who's every move modeled the act of giving love.
So, here I sit. Overwhelmed. But not only by grief. I'm overwhelmed by the love. Believe me, there is tons of love here! Family, friends, clergy, and God himself. It's radiating.
But, I am particularly overwhelmed by the love between Timm's mom and dad. I have never witnessed anything like it. And, I 'm so glad to be a part of it. And, for my kids to be a part of it too.
Here's Tim, 42 years after marrying Sharon. Sitting by her bedside 24 hours - only taking short breaks. He's rubbing her back, caressing her gently, telling her how much he loves her. Telling her it's OK to let go and be with Jesus. He's caring for her in ways that are so sweet. He knows which sheets she likes on the bed, which detergent she likes the smell of. When someone was going to use a wet wipe to help clean her, he said no and he prepared a warm bucket of water with the body wash "she likes". Everything. He knows all about her.
And it's because they stuck it out. They LOVED each other. Through the good, the bad, the happy, the sad, the joys, the disappointments, the frustrations, all of it!
Now, he is whispering stories in her ear - remembering the birth of each child and telling her how strong she was. Remembering funny stories from their dating and telling her how lucky he is that she stuck with him. Remembering loved ones who have passed and telling her how they are waiting to greet her in heaven. Telling her how special she is to every person in her life...one by one...in detail. And then assuring her that it is OK to let go and that each person will be OK.
UGH! The power of THAT kind of LOVE! It's crazy.
To me, it is a perfect picture of God's intention for marriage. They didn't have an easy, perfect life. But they shared it all and stuck by their promises to LOVE no matter what.
And now, I see the legacy that it is leaving for their kids, their grandkids, their nieces and nephews, and everyone lucky enough to know them. They have modeled, and continue to model, loving and serving each other just like the Triune God. A circle of love so complete. They give others a glimpse of the kind of love God wants us to know and imitate.
So, here I sit, early in the morning. Quiet. Dark. Praying for God to release Sharon from this world. And thanking and praising him for the gift of marriage. And for this amazing family I am blessed to be a part of.
I understand that their example reaches far beyond those who are married. It is an example for everyone and how we should love. But, it is just such a clear reminder of why I am so passionate about the covenant of marriage. And it is why I choose to invest time, resources, prayers and whatever I can to help others catch a glimpse of this amazing plan God has for marriage.
I can't end this post without including my own parents' model of marriage. I'm simply overwhelmed with the gift God has given Timm and I to have been raised by two sets of parents who cherish this covenant.
Right now, my mom is well over 1000 miles away. That is not where she wants to be at this moment. She would like to be here, in MI, serving, loving and showing love to me and my family and the family she has grown to love, my in-laws. But, life happens. She is laid up with a back that won't move! She is dealing with her own frustrations. My Dad celebrated his 70th birthday a few days ago by taking his wife to the ER, hanging out with her during tests, bringing her back to their place, making sure she was comfortable, and treating himself to taco bell for dinner.
When I talked to my Dad, what was his response? "I just feel so lucky. So blessed. We're doing just fine". And he meant it. Even though they can't be here to give me a hug and share in this time, they know they truly are lucky.
So, there you have it. I had to give up my family name. Carlson. A name my Dad proudly carries. A name that has a legacy of it's own from my Grandpa, my Dad, and now my brother. And, now I am a Kelly. And, I know that my Dad is proud to see the legacy continue in all of his children.
We are blessed BEYOND any comprehension or reason.

2 comments:

T$ said...

True. True.


I love you so much. I am the one that is blessed. By you. Your love. My marriage. I want our marriage to be like that of our parents. Of the triune God. Serving each other before ourselves. You model that for me each day that we have together. I hope that I tell you I love you enough an that I praise God for you all the time. Your beauty overwhelms mento the point of awe.

Anonymous said...

you are a superstar. So beautifully written. Such depth of truth and inspiration.
may all things work together for the glory of God. My hope is to shine joy in the sorrowful times.
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