Do we want wisdom?

Found myself in the Proverbs today.
Words from Solomon, who God blessed with unsurpassed wisdom.
Sure, I'll take some wisdom!  Who wouldn't want some more wisdom?
Actually, I think if we are honest, we don't always want more wisdom.  We might say we do, but do we really?
Today it really blew me away when I considered what Solomon did.  If we are familiar with the story, it probably seems trivial. But, it's remarkable!
In 2 Chronicles 1:7 God says to Solomon "Ask for whatever you want me to give you." And, what does Solomon ask for?  He asks for "wisdom and knowledge, that I may lead this people".  And here is the part I found interesting today.  God responds to Solomon saying "Since this is your heart's desire and you have not asked for wealth, riches or honor, nor for the death of your enemies, and since you have not asked for a long life, but for wisdom and knowledge....it will be given you..."
The way I see it, God is granting Solomon wisdom, but if he had asked for the other stupid stuff, he probably wouldn't have gotten it! When I looked more closely at God's words to Solomon, He didn't say "Ask me for whatever you desire and your wish is my command" (like a magic genie).
So, when I was reading in Proverbs today, it struck me.  It says "turn your ear to wisdom - apply your heart to understanding - call out for insight - cry out for understanding - search for it as for silver or hidden treasure...THEN you will understand and find the knowledge of God.  For the Lord gives wisdom."
How much prayer time do we honestly spend seeking wisdom, understanding, insight, knowledge?  And how much time to we spend reciting a list of wants, needs, desires, hopes and answers?
I don't think there is anything wrong with asking God for things! There are times when all we can do is cry out for God to do something, and I know He loves when we express our hearts to Him.
But today I am reminded that God promises wisdom and understanding.  He promises that if we seek HIM we will find HIM.
James 1:5 says "If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God who gives generously without finding fault."
Wisdom is not just knowledge, but understanding and discernment.  The ability to make wise decisions. Seeking wisdom is seeking God himself, not just "the answers".  When we seek God for the sake of seeking HIM and not just "answers" he promises us wisdom.
But I think we often want a crystal ball or a magic genie, and not more of God himself.  We want to fill our minds and hearts with answers and solutions and plans instead of wanting to fill our minds and hearts with the revelation of God himself.
But the very thing we crave and desire - to fill our hearts and minds - can be met by seeking God.  He delivers.  And when we find him, we find everything.
Love
Purpose
Truth
Identity
Direction
When we find that love, purpose and truth, it guides our decisions, plans and actions.  It transforms our own desires into His desires which are PURE and free from pride, selfishness, greed, and fear.
That's what we get when we seek Him!  We get the desires of His heart! It may not always match the desires of our own hearts.  But, He can change our hearts to be like His.  That's what I really want!
But, in order to believe this, I need to believe that He is Good.
I need to believe that He is trustworthy.
Otherwise, I simply hold on to my own desires, plans and hopes and desperately pray for Him to conform to what I demand Him to be and do for me.
Is that the God I really want?  A God who leaves it all up to me?  Or do I want a God who has proven to be all loving, all powerful, all trustworthy, all true, and beyond my wildest imagination of complexity?
I want more of him, and less of me - whatever that looks like.
If any part of me is transformed to be more like Him and more like the me he created and designed me to be for His purpose - that is my greatest JOY!
I want more of Him.  That's what I seek.
I wonder what would have happened if Solomon had asked God for something else like power? Or if he had asked for wisdom with a selfish motive, rather than a desire to lead people and honor God?