Interesting how the brain works. Fascinating really. That song is hard wired into my brain from sheer repetition. I went on a field trip with Alli last week to the "Brainology" exhibit at the museum of Natural History. IT WAS AWESOME. I can never get too much information about the incredible human computer lodged into our craniums!
ANYWAYS.
My human computer OFTEN gets way too many electrical impulses firing in way too many directions.
What's on my mind? I guess it's Alli. She's eleven. She's in 6th grade. In so many ways, she is a clone of me. Freaky. However, she is a MUCH better model, and she has many attributes that I admire and envy.
As her Mom, I consider it my #1 priority to instruct, nurture, care for and train her. I love that job. It's an honor. But it's hard. It was hard when she was a newborn and I didn't know what she wanted when she cried. It was hard when she was 2, 3, and 4 because she has such a strong, independent personality and she pushed every limit to establish who was boss and where the boundaries were. And now it's hard because I feel like I understand why they label her a "tween" now. She really isn't a "little kid" anymore, and she isn't grown up either. So, half the time she wants to be silly and playful and childish and innocent. The other half, she feels pulled to grow up. That's fine. But, as we all know, with growing up comes responsibility. And, she seems to be struggling to get a handle on that.
Here's the thing. It is my opinion that kids grow up TOO FAST. Everything is TOO FAST. And, living in NYC has magnified and amplified that. I don't want to baby my kids and spoil them and all of that. I just want them to be able to be kids.
And, when they go to school all day long....Alli goes for 7 1/2 hours a day....and then they come home and immediately start doing homework and they seem to have very little free time, I feel bad for them. When I was eleven, I don't think I had homework. The way Alli has to balance her studying and assignments and expectations reminds me of the later part of my high school years. Actually, even then I don't remember much homework.
Let me back up just a wee bit. See, she wasn't bringing home a TON of homework, and I thought all was well. Then, she brought home a progress report that shocked us! She was not doing so well. So, I had to commit to sitting down with her every night and working with her to increase the quality of her work. Increasing the quality is taking a lot of time and effort. It's not just her work, but the way she keeps her backpack (NASTY) and keeps track of her things (lots of lost stuff) and her room (YIKES). Like I said, she is my clone, so this is familiar territory. Just a pain.
I won't go on and on and on. I'll just say that it's hard.
I'm very much looking forward to the break. Even though they get homework over every break, which is stupid.
And, I will also say one more thing. I'm not ripping on alli. The things I honestly value most, she is demonstrating. Her conduct is excellent, she continues to make good choices, she is compassionate, generous, fun, and able to stand up for what she believes. THAT is what is most important to me.
She's my first born. I am learning as I go. We are officially in the next stage of parenting.
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